I & hellip; I don’& rsquo; t even know where to begin. I could really feel the mind cells passing away.
Is Robot Beast worthy of this collection? Yes, since it is a traditional. Made in 1953, Robotic Beast is a traditional example of a poor movie. Not simply poor, but downright horrible.
Why was this wrong also recorded, not to mention revealed to anybody? That would pay to see this garbage, as well as why? Why hasn’& rsquo; t every copy of this been melted as well as destroyed, and with humanity acting like it never ever occurred? I just wear’& rsquo; t get it. For the very first access in this task I looked at what numerous take into consideration to be the best flick ever before made (Resident Kane). I assumed it was good, yet not the best movie ever made. Robot Monster is the severe reverse.
Undoubtedly I haven’& rsquo; t seen ever before flick made, yet out of all the films I have enjoyed this certainly rates as the absolute worst one I have actually ever before had the misery of seeing.
Enigma Science Movie theater 3000 included this in an episode once. I would have instead have actually watched it that way, because at least after that it would certainly have been enjoyable. It’& rsquo; s just 63 mins, however excellent lord does it feel longer than Forrest Gump (I enjoy Forrest Gump by the way, however I thought it would certainly never ever end).
This film misbehaves, people. It’& rsquo; s nothing but cheesy horribleness. And it’& rsquo; s not & ldquo; so poor it & rsquo; s in fact pleasurable & rdquo; either; viewing it is a miserable time. Don’& rsquo; t enter into it after the very first ten mins as well as state “& ldquo; well perhaps it & rsquo; ll get better, & rdquo; as I did. It won & rsquo; t. It worsens, as well as worse,
as well as in some way also worse. I criticize individuals on Amazon.com that have actually offered this such a high score that it has a four-star ranking out of 76 testimonials. Pity on you people that ranked this very to make sure that innocent people like me might wind up viewing it when they scroll through Amazon.com looking for old films they’& rsquo; ve never ever seen.
You would think at some time in the 4 days that this movie was completed in that among the stars, or someone associated with the task, would have realized exactly how absolutely sorrowful every little thing about the flick was and quit it.
The bad guy of the movie is called Ro-Man, a robotic, obviously from the moon (however really from the world Ro-Man). Does it look like a robotic? No, because it’& rsquo; s a man in a fat gorilla suit with an old diving safety helmet on and also a rabbit-ear antenna strapped to the top of it.
It’& rsquo; s
SO poor. We & rsquo; ve all seen the flicks where something crazy is happening and after that at the end somebody wakes up and we realize it was all simply a desire (or perhaps it wasn’& rsquo; t and also you & rsquo; re complimentary to believe whatever you desire). Definitely the Wizard of Oz leaps out as one such flick, and an excellent one at that. This film is different because you understand it is all a desire and also you’& rsquo; re left wondering what the hell the factor of it was.
The flick begins with a terrible child actor (Gregory Moffett) playing an astronaut/spaceman and irritating his little sis who just wants to play residence. Both children hear a noise, so they go off to explore. They find two archeologists in a cavern working, and also normally the young boy stays in his duty of spaceman and also for some reason both adults humor the kid. At some point, the mother and older sis show up and also are upset that they ventured up until now off
Back at their little outing location, the kid asks his mom when they’& rsquo; ll have a papa and also she reacts & ldquo; would you like that?” & rdquo; Following point you know, they’& rsquo; re going to sleep and little Johnny awakens and also heads back to the cave. He’& rsquo; s using pants, yet after that there is an explosion that knocks him down as well as renders him subconscious. He eventually rises and also now he’& rsquo; s using shorts. He slips around the cave as the alien Ro-Man stumbles around clueless. Johnny after that heads back home.
What do you know, Johnny now has a father as well as it’& rsquo; s the earliest archeologist from earlier. Gee, do you believe little Johnny is fantasizing 5 minutes into the film?
I’& rsquo; ll spare the remainder of the story details, however I will state the entire property of the film is foolish. Johnny and also his family live in a flopped out residence that is “& ldquo; protected & rdquo; by a little electrical fencing. Evidently, this fencing makes them undetected to Ro-Man. Why? That knows? If that isn’& rsquo; t foolish enough, Ro-Man has used his “& ldquo; Calcinator Death Ray” & rdquo; to erase all human life on Earth. Well nearly all, as only eight individuals made it through. They made it through because they had actually been infused with a special serum that would make it so they couldn’& rsquo; t get sick, which obviously also made them immune to a fatality ray. Now, why the hell not?
Two of the survivors board a spacecraft and also attempt to make it to an orbiting space system. Ro-Man blasts them out of the air in a laughably poor sequence that includes the worst spaceport station ever. So we’& rsquo; re down to six: Johnny, his younger as well as older sis, his mother, and also the two archeologists playing the functions of his scientific daddy as well as the assistant/finance of his older sibling.
The people start speaking with Ro-Man via a machine, so currently he is figured out (and also gotten by “& ldquo; The Wonderful Assistance”& rdquo;-RRB- to destroy them. So currently the human beings must find a method to obtain Ro-Man, however the “& ldquo; daddy & rdquo; is quick to point out that he “& ldquo; is resistant! & rdquo; Possibly, but older sibling Alice chimes in with “& ldquo; unless we locate his weak spot!” & rdquo; Brilliant.
The individual in the match clearly couldn’& rsquo; t move very well. Undoubtedly, Ro-Man is seen in a number of shots just stumbling about in circles looking entirely clueless. And he walks so slow-moving that it’& rsquo; s absurd when he catches any of the human beings. They have to essentially stand there as well as let him grab them, or pretend to run and trip over nothing and then act like they can’& rsquo; t
rise. If you don & rsquo; t end up transforming the movie off, you’& rsquo; re going to be wishing that Ro-Man will eliminate each and every single one of the pinheads and finish the movie.
I’& rsquo; m mosting likely to begin viewing trailers for this collection prior to subjecting myself to any type of old film on Amazon. This trailer would certainly have saved me this waste of time.
The most effective point, and also without a doubt the only good thing, concerning this film is the musical arrangement which was done by the legendary Elmer Bernstein. But when the songs is the very best aspect of a motion picture, you understand that movie draws.
This is movie is full trash, so avoid it like the torment.
Robotic Beast gets a zero out of 5: DREADFUL.
Author
-
PatriotPaine
Gary is Proprietor and also Editor-in-Chief of Vortainment. He’& rsquo; s usually posting information as well as testimonials, and also doing all the back end stuff too. He suches as to play computer game, see motion pictures, battling and also college football (Roll Trend Roll).
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